Admittedly, I've been a tad crothety lately. I seem to be tripping over every poser, idiot and whiner in the county. Then I switch on the computer for news and views, and even 'biker forums' (and I use the very term in contempt) seem to be the parking slots for guys I don't even think own bikes. It was getting to me.

Then I got an epiphany. I suddenly asked myself, "Why don't I have these problems in my real life?"

For example, most people greet me at the gym with, "Did you ride in again this morning--was it cold?" Makes sense. My Sportster is there all of the time. Gym members see me come and go. I'm there every day.

When I go to the bike shop for coffee, most employees open with, "Did you bring Betty or Spinner?" They know my bikes when they see them parked, and they even know my pet names for them."

They even know about my boys' choir and that I still have my "choir robes."

In short, I don't have to do one little thing in my area culture. Nothing. I come and go, talk about the Packers, hit B&N for a late morning latte' and hassle the redheaded barista (oh, if I was younger), and polish a few knife edges. Or I'll blow off the entire afternoon, take my bike and my gas card and wander. In short, I spend zero time in discussing my status "in the culture." Now, contrast this with the problems I have on forums.

Yikes, the chest-thumping, the animosity, the kvetching (replete with modern jargon) and the outright flaming if you question a point they are trying to make. Then it hit me, they're not bikers. Never were. In the hopes of making contact with other normal, neighborhood-type guys, I dropped down the rabbit-hole to Wonderland. I'm surprised The Red Queen of the Road Clothes Empire hasn't stepped out from the shadows and yelled, "Off with his gas cap!"

I've been talking to west coast bikers this week. Lots of gray hair. Lots of pictures of guys on vacation with their bikes. Lots of pictures of female bartenders in various stages of undress. See my point?

Tourist,

Its a simple case of familiarity builds contempt. That and the ability of hiding behind the anonimity of ones key board. That and perhaps its TMI on our part?

I've always found your posts to be refreshing, you keep it real and a shared experience that falls well short of anything remotely familiar to the first time rider, young or old. And why you have caught more than your share of shat(the pleural of sh*t).

I wince a little sometimes because I think we are both guilty of hanging it out there just a little to far.......TMI and/or keeping it real does not fit in the politically correct world we now live in. I think motorcycle forums are meant to be superficial and fluffy.

I think the majority of motorcycle web sites are a true slice of whats going on in the motorcycle world of today....full of newbie azzholes trying to be something more than they are. And then can create that pesona...why not, you can be anything on a CPU.

I have met 1st time riders who posture and chest pound on the forum du jour and who own geezer glides and who will not ride far because it means going on the interstate? WTF is that.

BI63, it rained here today, and my wife wanted to hit B&N. After the gym, we went there, and I read a book called "The Harley-Davidson Reader." If you know anything about bikes, you'll know most of the guys who wrote chapters in this book. Including Sonny Barger. If you think I'm hard on guys who "wear their grandfather's clothes," you should see what these authors say.

Flat out, no one today is a biker by their standards. And they provide arguments.

On page 331, a chapter on the bad-boy outlaw culture, they write that modern bikers are about as outlaw as Ward Cleaver. In fact, they state that just buying a Harley is about as 'bad' as this breed can get.

Sonny Barger even champions what we all know. A real biker buys an FXR or a Dyna Glide. After that, it's the handling characteristics that actually demand the customization. When was the last time you heard any of these wannabees brag about their suspensions? Not once does he mention clothing, jargon, or 'the culture.' He doesn't have to, he is the culture.

Sadly, the 'bker generation' is long gone. The very debate on who's genuine is worthless. If you're not sixty years old, if there isn't a knuckle, a pan or a shovel in your history, or if there wasn't a 'choir' in your life experiences to dictate whacking off your sleeves, be awarded patches or emblems--instead of buying them--then your credentials don't exist. You're playing dress-up, co-opt'ing someone else's life.

You might still believe I'm too harsh. Get over it. Twenty-some-odd authors who know history better than I do have now compiled a book--not on the whiny whims of children wearing Halloween costumes--but on the people who actually created that history.

If there's color in your hair, you're a poser. Create your own history, and leave mine alone.

Okay, then let me answer that calmly and factually.

Most 'historical periods' last about a generation. For example, what you think of as 'the wild west' lasted twenty years. After that, it wasn't that wild. The military operation that hunted for Pancho Villa had automobiles. Even cow towns before the turn of the century had telephones.

What we think of as the 'biker culture' began in 1947 with the Hollister riot. I believe the Angels had formed by that time, but the Galloping Goose MC was the club of that era. So, count ahead twenty or twenty-five years. That places you in the late 1960s or early 1970s.

I saw that time. My mentors were aging. In fact, by the time I quit singing in the choir our initial choir director was a singer himself, having passed the baton to a younger music lover. I watched as there were more newbs than original singers. Now, guys like Barger should know. Those guys started the whole culture. Take a look at their pictures, the shaggy beards, the clothes, and the bikes. It was their life, their period. I heard this "paying homage" crap until I want to puke. It's not honor, it's theft.

What would you say if you saw a twenty-something strut down the street wearing a military uniform from WWII? Would you call him a 'shining example of history,' or a flat out poser? After all, a WWII uniform dates back to this same era. Now, you might think of this as hyperbole, but it ain't your life, it's mine.

You weren't there, you contributed nothing, you aren't a brawler, you probably haven't even built the bike you're sitting on. I would respect those guys more if they rode a Suzuki and a ballistic nylon jacket that still had its sleeves.

Hmmmm (scratching head).

Everything evolves to a point. Standards change. Technology changes. People change. While Mr. Barger may have started out on a hardtail/rigid Sportster in his younger days he ended up on a Road Glide as he got older. I think it only makes sense to make certain adaptations for the better. The Hells Angels first bumble bee looking death heads while traditional,historic and sentimental pales in appearance compared to their new Deaths Head logo.

You mention a Dyna and FXR is for real bikers. Actually I think real bikers rode rigid and stripped down garbage barges in there hey day, but I am not really sure of that. Its what I think I saw and why I built my rigid Pan.

Dyna's/FX's seem to have been the outlaw bike dujour in the late 80's. and '90's. Now you're starting to see more and more baggers in the 1% MC ranks. Which makes sense to me given they tend to ride 20,000 miles a year or more.

A biker is anyone who rides a motorcycle. A real biker.....thats whole 'nother waste of discussion.

I've changed and I have built a bike and have made several custom alterations to my present ride. I built this and rode it for 25+ years. 1963 FLH one time garbage barge:


Now at 55 years old I happily ride this(2001 Shriners addition Ultra) having sold the pan to a much younger friend who I saw was loving it as much as I did:


And I as much as I am able to. I have 5 weeks vacation a year and that helps. Plus I get 4 day weekends once a month. There are many others who for what ever reasons are able to ride more often and they do. And I figure them lucky.

I agree. The problem is that the posers are not evolving. Their copy-cat behavior seems to have stalled in 1967. I'm surprised they don't wear peace symbol earings and bell-bottoms.

In that regard, the bikes you and I ride have also changed--because we live in the here and now. Sure, I'd like to build up a shovel, and I do derive a certain amount of pleasure from my stripped down Sportster. But at the end of the day I'm a sixty year old man and the Sportster has a digital clock.

I don't wear a Zoot Suit, carry a flintlock, own a hula hoop, or run a peanut tank with stars and stripes.

The idea here is the seeming worship of arrested development. Now if you started wearing your old bell bottoms from your personal closet we might find it odd--but they would be yours. I have a pair of jeans from 1978 that I wear. They are mine.

But we both know I do not cling to the lifestyle of the 1960s. I'm a tourist now, not a biker. The problem is that the younger tourists claim to be bikers.

Your thoughts bring to mind that there is a distinct possibility that I am, by todays prevalent motorcycle riders standards, an obsolete dinosaur. Trying to fit in with todays genre of main stream motorcyle riders is not meant to be. No hard feelings now that I realize this. I'll keep rambling here until someone somewhere takes umbrage and than I will quietly shuffle on down the peaceful and quiet road of anonimity.

On the way into work I stopped at the local Grange Hall. A friend of mine from the same town, Brian Keating, was having a motorcycle show there and because of my work schedule he came in early to let me view his bikes before I came to work, nice guy and one of the perks of being a fellow "Old Timer" rider. And thats weird given I live in the middle of by God no f'ing where's and here is this killer motorcycle show,lol:

https://www.keatingwheelcompany.com/DSCN5212.JPG (the show poster)


So while I may not fit into the politically correct main stream and just add water and stir new riders of today.....I get mines,lol. I'll post the pictures in the next couple days as well as share some pretty interesting news for the NE motorcycle world that some may or may not know.

There were 26 bikes in Brians display, not all his. Some on loan from folks from all around New England and other parts unknown. Brian is dialed in with the JP Cycle folks and has bikes in the National Motorcycle museum,Anamosa,IA and in Wheels thru time in Maggie Valley,NC as well .

Oh, no question in my mind. Both of us are dinosaurs, and both of us are tourists (using that old school idea). Neither of us "live the lifestyle." And I don't want to anymore.

In fact, this book makes a good case for that idea with one observation. The book points out that this "biker" era was rife with debauchery--it actually uses that word. I do not wish to speak for you, but in my case, very true.

It adds, since the boomer bikers have aged, we do not live that way any more--and in my case it's more than 30 years. The real nugget is that the posers never have lived the lifestyle. In fact, even saloon brawls make "Gangland" on TV because they are so rare.

Speaking of Gangland, I watched an interview with some real-deal 1%ers. Neat, clean, right down to their choir robes. One guy had a leather jacket with an Eton collar. They were polite to the camera man and the interviewer. No slang, no epithets, no cursing.

Now, if real deal bikers have changed their procedures and lifestyle, then so should the insurance salesmen bikers. I have no problem with a guy buying a Harley, riding it, enjoying it, cruising with his friends. I customize my bikes, go buy pipes and a super-tuner. Have fun.

Just don't give me this "Live to Ride" crap. You don't live to ride. You live to sell insurance and reside in suburbia like the rest of us. Unless you have a Time Machine in your three bedroom $300K dwelling and you can get some free time when your 2.5 children are at soccer practice, you haven't been to 1967.

How about....."Live To Accessorize, Accessorize To Live"? LOL And SOB is it expensive these days, holy shiznit! I'd say from the time I quit dumping money in my bike till I started again there was a lapse from about 1990 thru 2007-2008. The prices have quadsinchcoed!!!! No more 50-60$ exhaust. Frames have over doubled. Once many years ago I could have owned an original HD springer for 300$ and that was refurbed too. Oh well. Luckily I have the money to keep up with the times.

Challenge any of those snail slime 1st time owner/operator key board commandoe c suckers and from the keyboard they are spartan like,lol. In person....not so much. Tall like pine tree black like crow talk more sh*t than 2 radio's.

I have adresse's of some.............imagine they hear the door bell or a knock on the door and there I stand...on their keyboards they'd post oh I'll pull out my gun or I'll throw down. In real life it'd be an arse kissing festival. I've done it. I've been there and I've see and experienced it.

Moral of the story I had respect for my elders, listened and learned as I was at one time an up and coming fledgling rider. I knew that that at one point I would cycle up to the older guy one day.

Right back at you. LOL. At least that tattoo would be honest!

I've often told the story that a cyber-choir filed a complaint to my choir because their feelings were hurt over something I printed in a forum. Yikes, how big a prussy do you have to be to do something that lame? Then in the next breath they claim to be a legitmate choir. I expect to see pictures of them riding side-saddle.

I would have had more respect for them if they had come here to wrinkle my sheet music. Never heard another word from them. Cheaters prove.

Hey, what do you expect? During my college years there were 40K students at the UW Madison. We'd have huge protest marches with guys shaking their fists, threatening to "smash the state." I wore my choir robes to class every day. Not one of these heroes so much as coughed in my direction, even at 40K:1 odds.

Seeing these things fuels my contempt. More to the point, they live this mockery using my slang, stealing my clothes, co-opt'ing my bikes and then insulting me that it's "homage." For Pete's sake, if you're going to masquerade, then do it right!

Quit bathing and hit somebody with a pool cue. Or, STFU.